------------------------------------------------------------------------ Director: Mystery Sonic Theater 3000, Episode 301: Uncle Bob Returns! Take one. (BEEP) In the far and distant future, Long after we all have died The crew of H Hog's starship had gone on an insane ride. Captain H Hog made a great attack, But Robotnik,he did counteract, Though he did fight so well and proud, Robotnik forced him underneath the clouds. "I'll send them crazy fanfics, the worst around the globe." (lalala) "That will make them panic, & then I'll defeat that dope!!" Starring: H Hog! (Boyohboy!!!) Now keep in mind, H Hog can't control, to make the fics stop or end. (lalala) Jamming would make their position known, Risking both his ship and friends! CREW ROLE CALL! TONIC! (Check out my spikes!) AUSTON! (Lupe's cool.) SESTREN! (We're all in big trouble.) AAAAAARMAGE! (I'm busy. Come back later.) If you're wondering how hedgehogs can be blue, & other Sonic-facts. (lalala) Your fanboy-ness is scaring me, So sit down and relax! for Mystery Sonic Theater 3000! [The doors] 1-Iris (think "Alien", "James Bond" opening) 2-forcefield 3-sliding bars (Like in "Doom") 4-Ice block (turns instantly into pouring water) 5-sliding patio door H Hog: Hello, and welcome here on my starship. Sestren: The latest in Armoured Mecha anywhere! Armage: Umm...this is just a regular starship, Ses. Sestren: WHAT?!? My life is a lie!!!! H Hog: Umm...yeah. Well, This is the ship, and this is my crew. All: Hiya. H Hog: In here, we like to search the internet for GOOD fanfics to read, and sometimes, unwillingly, we get a bad one from "Sir Chubby of Eggness" (laughter), which we lovingly critisize. Our biggest challenge here is to stay awake during these bad fics, as well as keeping our brains from exploding. Tonic: (Clenched teeth, petrified) NYAAarghhh!!!!! Pain!!!! H Hog: Oh, damn. Auston, please turn off that fanfic. Auston: Ay-Ay! (turns off video screen with eyes closed) Tonic: (collapses in relief) H Hog: Apparently, that was a "Bad fanfic in sheeps clothing". Auston: And there are a lot of 'em out there! H Hog: Quite. Ohwell, another thing we do he... (Alarm sounds) H Hog: Oh damn. Quick, Sestren! Hit the De-scrambler! Armage, on screen! Sestren: Awrighty! Armage: Done! Robotnik: (On screen) Nyahaha! Why H Hog, you weren't thinking of jamming my broadcast, were you? H Hog: Of course not, you know darn well that if we would, you'll have our position instantly, and force us to surrender. Robotnik: Well, wether you'll surrender or not, me and my Swatbots will probably find you soon enough. Tonic: (sounding woozy) Thoze rustbucketz can'tz evven vind the broad zzide ov a b...BARF!!! H Hog: Oh man... Ses, could you please get him to sickbay? The fic got him pretty bad...Unit 15, clean up this mess... (Robots come out and clean up the chunks) Sestren: Okay. Come on, guy. Let's get you some Maalox, 'kay? Tonic: Y*burp*eah... (Sestren and Tonic walk off) H Hog: Well, I hope you're happy, Eggmeister. Now we got a sick one over here. Robotnik: Don't blame this one on me! I didn't send that one! (mumbles) Although I wish I had.... H Hog: Well, then I hope you're unhappy. Robotnik: On the contrary, I got a delicious fanfic here for you to enjoy! H Hog: Oh yeah? Who made it? Robotnik: SONIC FAN did it. All MST'rs left: NOOOOOO!!!! Please don't!!! Robotnik: Then surrender! Armage: Never!!! We'd rather see the fanfic! Robotnik: Very well. Then here it is! (FANFIC SIGN) H Hog: We got FANFIC SIGN! (7...6...5...4...3...2...1) (MST'rs enter) (Sestren and Tonic come in) H Hog: Feeling better, Tonic? Tonic: Yup. Lemme at the fanfic! H Hog: (exasperated) Okay... (MST'rs sit down) >Subject: FANFIC: Uncle Bob Returns! >From: ***********@yahoo.com (SONIC FAN) (Even though we hate the guy,there's still a li'l thing called privacy...) >Newsgroups: alt.fan.************** Tonic: Aww no, not another SONIC FAN fanfic, please? Well, here goes "Sonic fights Robotnik part 2.863.854.743... >AUTHORS NOTICE >Hey i thought that i would stop writing sonic fights robotnik and instead >just write stories because it would be dumb to have like sonic fights >robonik 52 ad nauseam and stuff. Tonic and Sestren:(simultaneously) Thank god. Armage: Now if he'd stop writing ANYTHING, this world would be a much better place. Auston: Idealist. >Here is how uncle bob came back to knothole this story was wreitten very fast so tis not as >good as the others probobobly. Tonic: This sentence is under heavy construction. Please use the detour. >COPYRIGHT NOTCIE >Hey dude, sonic is copyrights of those dudes at archine. Blah bklah, other satuff is >copyright of their owners. Got it? Ok, now get this, i do Auston:Anyone, Anywhere, Anytime. H Hog: Figures...I always knew SONIC FAN was a sic lil' S.O.B... >not mean to claim ownership of anything in this story. so ya ya ya now lets read the story >END COPYRIGHT NOTICE >BEGIN STORY IN >6...5...4...3...2....1 Armage: We have lift off! >Uncle Bob Returns! >By: SONIC FAN >A cool short-story >Hello its knothole Auston: Hey, howya doin'? >and today is tuesday lets see what the freedom fighters are doing, hmmmmmm? Sestren: Let's not, hmmmmmm? Armage: Hey, he SAID it's a short story, but not THAT short... >SONIC HUT H Hog:Sonic Hut is a place where i sit Auston:There isn't a spelling error quite like it. >"YYAYYAHAHAHYAYAYY!!!!" went sonic as he played guitar and jammed and jumped around spinning off wallls and running on the roof. >Tails walks in :"yo sonic dude" Tonic: (Texan accent) This here's a "Dude ranch". Ev'yone's called "Dude" here. >SONIC says "AHEY! WHat up low-bro?" Armage: How low can you bro? >Tails said"oh nothing ehwat u doing?" >"JAMMIN!" said Sonic Sestren: Suddenly,I feel the urges to play Toejam & Earl... >"oh COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!" said Tails H Hog: So cool, everyone dies of Frostbite. End of story. Auston: If only... >TAils plays the drunms its a rocking good! >JUST THEN ROTOR JUMPIN JACK FLASH THRU THE HUT! Tonic: With courtesy of Whoopi Goldberg. >"Woh woh" say sonic "yo rote" >Rotoro stops. Armage: Rotoro... Isn't that a place in New Zealand? Sestren: No, that's RotorUA. I think Rotoro is spanish for Bull-roadkill. > runs back "HEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYY SONIC!!" he yells in sonics ear Auston: (Sonic) Dee-D...i mean Rotor! Get out of my labor...er..my hut! >"yo hi" said sonic >"Whatever happened to uncle bob?" said Rotor >"He left" said Tails "In sonic fights robotnik 3" >"I hate ken penders" said sonioc H Hog: Sonioc is our new sponsor. BUY SONIOC BATTERIES! Tonic: & another member of the "I hate Ken Penders" club. >The camerman says "hurry up and finish this scene" >"YO-K man!" sayed sonic Auston: What's a K-man? Armage: Someone who works at K-mart...duh! >"lets find uncle bobo" says TaILS! >"uncle boob?" says sonic >"bobo?" rotor said "WHAAAAAAAAAAT?????" >"typo" says Tails H Hog:"Stupid" says me. >"OH!" say sonic and rotor >all 3 jump though a walll Auston: ...was in the way. Sestren: So the forth wall crashed, to reveal... >OUTSIDE Sestren: Of course, wat'cha expect, a cow? >-__-__--_--_--_-_--_----__-__--_ H Hog:Morse code for "Please stay!!!" >: ) H Hog: There is NO reason to smile! >AHHHHH!!! goes sonic they run into sally >"AK!" sas SallY! >"Ooop!" says rotor >"Yyayayyayaya" say tails "We go find uncle bob!" Armage:(Tails) *Tarzan yell* AYAAAYAYAYAAAA!!! Me Tailzan. Me go find Uncle Bob. >"No yo bro" says Sallly "Youre not going, uncle bobs not going here" >"waaah" says tails >"no and the answere is no!" says sally >"waaaah sniff waaah" says tails >"Well a'ight" says Sally "Just be coreful!" Sestren:(Tails) Coreful? That's easy, I like Hardcore!!!! >"YO WE WILL SALLL" yells sonic >sonic yells into a megaphone "I LOVE U SAL LETS HAVE CYBERSEX!" >"i hope i was being discreet" said sonic >(JOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) Tonic: "I hope i faked my laughs convincing enough" said Tonic (JOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) (The 5 leave) (1...2...3...4...5...6...7) H Hog:And now for a small musical interlude. MST'rs grab instruments; H Hog a guitar,and a mike. Tonic a Saxophone, Sestren sits himself behind a Keyboard, Auston gets the Bass, and Armage grabs the drumsticks, and riffs the drums a little. Awright! Everyone, Knux's theme of Sonic Adventure! (Everyone starts Playing) (If you have a MIDI of Knux's theme, play it now, for effect.) (H Hog)Here we come, dissin' all the rest of them the worst of them, writing bad fanfics You can call us picky, but when fanfics are icky, we're just gonna be sicky. We never fail, although it's hard to tell. we read 'em and dump 'em if they're really stale. Unlike the most we know if fanfics really are toast or we dump 'em in the trash as if they are lost! (Auston,Sestren,Armage & Tonic) Stuck on a starship in the heavens Robotnik's trying to make us surrender we have a strange but useful mission Our partnership is really neccesary, yeah (H Hog) We'll try to give the best fanfics to you Must cleanse the net of stuff that just won't do (Other MST'rs) Lots of fics around the world are mostly filled with badness Dripping with insanity and stuffed with sadness We won't stop until the world of fandom will be restored This is our motto, we will fight to keep it alive... (End music) (The 5 walk back into the Theater) >"sal is cybersexy" says Rotor "oops i said that didnrt I?" Auston: No, you didn't. OF COURSE YOU DID!!! WADDAYA, DUMB?? H Hog: Well, being a technician doesn't make you a smart guy... >"YES!" says sal "Go away before i have to kill you all" >"otay" says Tails >"YAAAHHHH BUH-WEET!" says SOnic Sestren: Sonic's imitating a 5-foot Flickie. >ZOOM ZOOM BAM BOOM! ran sonic H Hog: Wow, he runs with banging sounds! >_-__-_-_----_---__----____----_ H Hog: Morse for: "I know you're out there, I can hear you snoring!" >A MILLION MILES AWAY Tonic:Whoops, too far! >5 minutes later Tonic:...and a couple of thousand miles back... >"Sonic stops" said sonic, stopping. >"sonic stopped" says tails >"stopped sonic" said rotor >"hmm funy how a typo turns into humerous dialoge" saiys sonic >i am typing fast" said SONIC FAN Armage: No, don't tell me he's IN this fanfic as well!! >just then bots attak. lots of bots!' >"ahhhh" sayd tails "focky!" >"No fock!" say sonic >"oh shet" says rotor >"ROOTOR!" say sonc in tails >A fight ensuses. Sestren:(Rotor)Aww, it's just Focky and Shet. They're Robotnik's new Henchmen. >sonic spins bots THEY DIE! >rotor kicks bots THEY DIE! Auston: Somebody should tell SONIC FAN that Swatbots don't live, and therefore can't die either. >"Wie spak spak!" tails says, fighting bots as they die >END RESULT >Bot casulaties: 10000 sonic casulies: 0 H Hog: Now we know he's a DOOM fan. >"cool" say sonic >"FOCKIN' A!" says Tails Tonic:Fockin' A? What's "A" mean?!? >they walk into secret baste Sestren: Secret... Baste?? Armage:(Robotnik) Nobody can know MY way to cook a turkey! >-_-__---_------__-----_-__-___- Tonic:Morse for "Aww, I promise the next paragraph will be good!" >SECRET BASE >"Hello anyody home?" sayd SOnic Auston: Where, in yer HEAD? NO!!! >"i am scared" said tails >"BOOOOOOO WOOOOBOOOGIIIIEEE!!!" says rotor,m scaring tals >"AHAHHAHAHHAHHHHH!!!" said tals "ROTOR SCARED ME!" >"shaddap" says Sonic Tonic:(Rotor) Aww, I just wanted to Boogie with Tails. >They go thru the dark secret base, it is scary and dark. >shadow bot attacks! sonic fights it and wins! H Hog: Sonic received 154 Exp. points! Sonic gained a level! New HP maximum! New TP maximum! Learned a new technique "EAT MY DUST"!!! Sestren: NOW we know he's an RPG fan. (MST'rs nod) H Hog: Who, me or SONIC FAN? Sestren: Both. Auston:Umm...H Hog, have you ever heard of "Phantasy Star"? (H Hog's note:In my opinion the best Genesis RPG ever made) H Hog:(happy, slightly crazed look on face) Yeah, why? (Other MST'rs slap foreheads in unison) >They move on >CREAK CREAK CREK Armage: Those are the crickets chirping, 'cause SONIC FAN has no more audience left. >"Whats tha?" says SOnic >"I hear steps" says Rotor Auston:(Sonic) NO!!! I hate their music!!! >"hold on" says the camerman "i will turn on infared" Tonic: Convenient, isn't it? >click >buzzz >"hey look its uncle bob!" says Tails All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! >"Good Mornin' to ye!" says Bob Tonic: Yeah, it WAS a good morning... until I saw YOU!!! >"YO BOB!: say sonic >"Och, ye larden! wasup with ye?" says ob Armage:He meant to write: "Say, S.O.B..." >"want to live at knothole?" says tails >"ok, my trailer blew up" said bob H Hog:(Bob)A-Yup, i'se had too much gosh darn Chili dowgs, an' bean dip. Wun fart 'n wun match, an' the entire trailer park blew up! Auston: Now that's just sick. >"how did you know his trailer blew up?" says Sonic >"i phoned him a few days ao" said tails >JUST THEN ROBOTNIK STEPS ONTO THE SCNEE!' Sestren: The Scnee probably didn't like that.... >"Ha ha" says robotnik >"Lard o' chubbin'!" say bob >Heli-bots shoot thru the ceiling sonic trys to get awaya but can;t! Armage: (Sonic)...Just...can't...reach...Awaya! Must...save...her! >roobntik captures the ff's Tonic: Okay, -rom now on, SONIC -AN is called SONIC AN. so -orget the -'s. >They are shoved into a hoverunit that transports them to robotniks TV station in the dessert! H Hog: MMMmm...Dessert... Tonic: Waitasec... Did he say TV station? H Hog: Yah, why? Tonic: SONIC -AN often uses "the Robotnik Show", and I guess it's that time again. >D ESRT >Bwa bwa bwa...BWA .... hshstshshshthtssth >ON TV... >this is script -ormat! >(music plays) >ANNOUNCER: DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO IT's THE ROBOTNIK SHOW! >(more music) >ANOUNCER: WITH DR. ROBOTNIK! All: BOO!!!!! >(wonky tunes) >ANOUNCER: WITH GUESTS SALMA HYEK and KEN PENDERS! MUSICAL GUEST KNUCKLES AND HIS REGGAE BAND! Auston: Oh great, Knux is back with Robotnik again. Sestren: The dirty traitor... >(music) >ANNOUNCER: AND SNIVLEY AND THE SWAT BOT ORCHASTRA >ANNOUNCER: NOW HERE"s THE SULTAN O- SALTY SNAK -OODS...DOCOTR ROBOTNIK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >(robotnik bounds in) >ROBOTNIK: hi! >ROBOTOCIZED EWROKERS IN AUDIESNCE: YAAAHHHHHH CLAP CLAP!!!!Y >YAHAAYHAYHAHYh!! >wooOOoOOOOOOOOooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Armage:Drugs are bayd, mmmmkay?. >Robotnik: Now here'z snivley and swat bots! >(snivley, wearing sunglasses, plays the sax, the swat bots play other instruments. they play the pee-wee herman song) (All SCREAM) All MST'rs:YAAAAAARGHHHHH!!!!!! >Robotnik: (sitiing in desk) doo doooDOOO! doo doo doo doo doo doo DOO >D OO! Tonic:Yup, this show is "big DooDoo". -irst thing we do tonight is H Hog:(Pinky)Try and take over the world, Brain? unthaw Dr. Quack Auston: UNthaw? why don't ya just say Re-reeze? Sestren:Okay, Let's bring back the F's again, please? >(grounder and scratch brings out frozen dr quack >Grounder: Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh >SCRATCH: HHEHEHEHHEhehHEHHEHHEH!!!!! H Hog:Beavis and Butthead were here, and they've taken over Scratch and Grounder. >(they put dr. quack in big microwave) >ROBOTNIK: PLay that funky microwave music sniv man! >(band plays microwave sonG) >D ING Armage: That should say "S PLAT", and Dr. Quack is a goner,because you can't put living things in the microwave. Auston:Now that's REALLY sick. (Tonic starts to turn even greener than he already is) >(dr quack is unthwaed he steps out) >QUACK: hey hey yo, what? >RObotniK: you not dead! >QUAK: Quak quak cool! >(but dr quack is somehow different) >(man walks on stage) >KEN: hell i'm ken penders Tonic:(Ken) Hell? It's me, Ken Penders. >ROBOTNIK: fock off >KEN: ok >(robotnik kicks ken off stage into the audience) >AUDIENCE: HAAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHA!!!!! H Hog: He won't have much guests let if he keeps doing that... >ROBONTIK: Now lets brign out the HEDGEHOG AND FRIENDS! (robotnik throws cuecard out the fake window) >*KRASH* Armage: NOW you know he's a "Letterman" fan... >SOnic and friens are hustlesd on stage by sWAT bots >ROOBOTNIK: HAHHAhahahha Whoi shall we roobotocize first >BOB: FOCK YE ROBOTNIK! Y'ER A BIG EEJIT! All: DO BOB FIRST! >RoBOTNIK: hmm perhaps the scotsman >SNIVLEY: ya i need bagpipes >ROBOTNIK: ok get in the robocizer >(obob gets in) H Hog: Willingly? that's new! Auston: (Robotnik) Obob, git outta there, and make room for Bob! >JUST THEN SONIC IS SPINNIN AROUND HES KILLIN BOTS LIKE THERES NO TOMMOROW!!! Tonic:There won't BE a tomorrow for SONIC FAN if he keeps using that capslock key! >SOnic slam dunks a bot head in the garbage can >SONIC: 50000000000000000000 points! Sestren:(Sonic)Sonic Spinball, anyone? >SONIC FREES TAILS >TAILS NINJA FIGHTS! >TAILS KIKCS DOWN THE ROBOTOCIZER UNCLE BOB IS FREE! >KABOOOKMMKRAKAKAKKAKAKAKKAK POW! goes bobs shotgun! >BOB: I focking make short work of ye bots! H Hog: You'd think Robotnik would armor his bot's so they can AT LEAST handle bullets, but noooo... >ROBOTNIK: ha ha i locked the doors you can't get out of here >QUACK: No, I ujuts UNLOCKED THE DOOR HA! Tonic: I repeat: Convenient, isn't it? >ROBOTNIK: No! you betreyt me! >QUACK: May i join u sonic Auston: (Sonic) Well.... I guess you might say...NO!!!! >SONIC: ya dude >THEY FUGHTS KILLIN A MILLION BOTS THE WHOLE PLACE IS EXPLODING THE GOOD GUYS RUN DOWN THE BASMENT ROBOTOCIZED WORKER BOTS ARE FLYIN THU THE AIR Tonic:GODDAMN CAPS LOCK KEY!!! >LOOK OUT TAILS!!! Tials gets in just in time they slam the door on a >flying bot! fwonk! >TAILS: SOmebody down here >BOB: yeh, aye am >TAILS: no that guy >(they see Rabbit Rabbot) Sestren: Sounds like a frog. >RABBIT: Good afternoon to ye >SONIC: ITS bUNNIES LONG LOST DAD Tonic: Kill the capslock, Kill the capslock... >RABBIT: I WAS IN JAIL, here, mmm-hmm >SONIC: we saved you lets juicin jam! Armage: Mmmm....Juicy jam... Auston: *looks puzzled* Armage: Especially nice with Peanut butter!! >SONIC Pulls out a powr ring >RABBIT: Some folks call it a power ring, i call it a potater, mmm-hmm H Hog: Somehow, That seems hard to swallow... >They rush teh door! bot killing ACTION! zoom fwahs kqaboom! >Uncle Bob riverdances on stage with some bots Sestren: Riverdance...Was that "Klippity-Klippity-Klip-Klop", or "Stippity-Stippity-Stomp-Stomp"? Tonic: I think it's "Tippity-Tippity-Tap-Tap". >ROBOTNIK: NO NO NO!!!! Tonic: Then what is it? >They run out of the building and divei nto the sand >JUST THEN THE BUILDING EXPLODES >FWAP BAP BOO-BAP SHADDA LADDIA SHIBBI BIBBI HOOOOOOOOO-AAAAHHHHH! >RABBIT: hot dam Armage: Git down to the beat of MST3K! >they run back to knothole >ROBOTNIK: No nO NOOOOooO! They beat me again! WAAAAHHH!! THIS SUCKS! Auston: Huh-Huh, Huh. This sucks. Sestren: Enough Butt-head. Auston: (fuming) EXCUSE ME?? Sestren: No, I meant... AARGH!! *Auston punches Sestren to the ground, K.O'ed him.* Armage: Oh, great, now HE doesn't have to suffer as much as WE have to. >(knuckles shows up) >KNUCKLES: Hey mon, is it time for our act >ROBOTNIK: all the cameras are dead, except for that one >"Hey" says our cameraman >Knucles and the chaotix band set up >(band plays music) >KNUCKLES: oooh yeah, we're jammin' >robotnik dances BACK AT KNOTHOLE >_-_-__--__-___-_-__-__-----__-_--___-- H Hog: Morse for "Come on, I tried..." >SONIC RUNS RIGHT INTO DULCY >Dulcy " budda don't wann do HOMEWORK??!?!?!" H Hog:(Sonic:) Waah! "Homework" with YOU?!? Tonic: Who said Dulcy meant THAT? H Hog: Hey, this is a SONIC FAN fanfic, isn't it? Tonic: Good point... >the others run into antoinne >"le oof" says antoinee >SAlly shows up >"AAHHHH WHATS DR QUACK DOING HERE???" SCEMred sallly >"Hes a good guy now" said Sonic >"Quack yes" said Dr. Quack >"Ok Dr Quack and Uncle Bob you have to pass the interview before you can become freedom fighters. I wil ask you the secret questions. Anything that happens inside that hut does not leave the confines of that hut, ok?" Armage: Uhh...No? >"Aye" said bob >"QUAK-OK!" said Dr. Quack >They go to sallys hut >"DADY!" says Bunnie >"Hello ye daughter of mine" sais Rabbit Rabbot >(emotional scene) >The camraman gets bored and falls asleep >"HEY WAKE UP!" says sonic >"WHa" says cameramna" oh" >bow-bow-chick-womp-bow-wukka-chiak-chjika H Hog:Great, first we had "Stippity-Stippity-Stomp-Stomp"... Tonic: You mean "Tippity-Tippity-Tap-Tap". H Hog: Yeah, Whatever. Then it was "FWAP BAP BOO-BAP SHADDA LADDIA SHIBBI BIBBI HOOOOOOOOO-AAAAHHHHH hot damn", and now the bow-bow-chick-womp-bow-wukka-chiak-chjika??? Damn, SONIC FAN sure has rythm!! Sestren:(Wakes up from K.O.)...He must play "Samba de Amigo" a lot. H Hog:Ah, good, you're back. >TAils" I am getting funk to this disco beat >Sally walks out of the hut followed by unc. bob. and quak. Armage: (rhyming) unc.bob.and.quak. is the IP address of SONIC FAN. Block it everywhere while you still can. >Sally:" ahhh... they are freedom fighters now!!!!!!!!" >"yaaaaay!!!!!!" say knotholes inhabitents! >PARTY TIME >"TIme to test my new invention": says rotor >ROTOr test the catapult SONIC TAILS ROTOR UNCLE BOB AND DR QUACK ARE >THROW A BILLION FEET INT THE AIR Tonic: FREAKIN' CAPS LOCK KEY!!!! >-_---__---_---_---- H Hog: Morse code for:... All:SHUT UP!!!! H Hog: Hey, howd'ya guess? >SONICS HUT >JUST THEN SONIC, TAILS, DR QUACK, ROTOR,,,, AND UNCLES BOB falls THROUGH THE ROOF OF THE HUT! Tonic:If he does that ONE MORE time, i'm going to SONIC FAN's house, and PERSONALLY rip off his Caps lock key!!! H Hog: Do you even DARE going to SONIC FAN's house? >"WobbbA!" said SOnic H Hog: Now what kind of an answer is THAT? Come to think of it,who asked you anyway? >AND THATS TEH JUICY JAMMIN EWND OF OUR TALE. YO ARCHIE FEEL FRE TO MAKE THIS INTO A COMIC BOOK, JUST EMAIL ME AT ***********@yahoo.com YOU CAN HAVE THE STORY FOR FREE IF U WANT. Auston: It'll be a cold day in HELL before that ever happens. >"fini" said Antoine >"AH zed FININ! YOU LEAVE NOW! LEEEEVEEEVEEEEE!!! ZEEE HOOGOGGOOGOOOGOIOR (#UJT)*(#8ijJ*(F#PHJ*pndfnvnopdsnhv98nfewiofmnweofewmvc 89032uf8932umn890unm4c3u2n88&*&#N*@&N*VNM&@*cm8) (2m$)*(MN*@(&MNC)*(@&*)($CN@*()MNV&M@(*&$*(V&$MN*&V*" Sestren: How do you pronounce that? >JUST THEN SEXHOG WALKS IN and says "Hey is that a binary of a sonic sex pic?" H Hog:(Antoine) No, but try www.*******.com/*******. (H Hog's note: As if i'm REALLY gonna give that addy! Ask Justin Reese(The so-called "Sonic god") if ya want it, but you'll be sorry, or sick!!) (The 5 leave) (1...2...3...4...5...6...7) H Hog: Well Robotnik, I hope you're happy, this fic crushed my brain pretty bad. Armage:(sings)"AAAIIIiii.... can see cleeeeearly now, the brain is gone..." Robotnik:Well, that's the purpose. So, are you ready for more? All MST'rs: NO!!!! Robotnik:Well, tough luck, i'm gonna give you more of these, unless you surrender IMMEDIATELY!!! Auston: No way, Botmunch! Sestren: Yeah, if we can handle THIS one, the next ones can't be THAT bad... Robotnik: Curses! Well, i'm gonna set Snively on over-hours searching for something so evil...So bad, that your heads will explode just by reading the title!!! Armage: Bring it on, Dragonbreath! Tonic: We can handle ANYTHING!!! H Hog: Except perhaps a Pokemon Fanfic... Robotnik: WHAT?!?!? What do you think I am, a MONSTER? No, Pokemon Fanfics are even too horrible for YOU scum. Let's keep it at Sonic, or at worst, a Sonic/Mario CROSSOVER. All: (simultaneously) NOOOOOO!!!!! God, Noooooo!!!! Robotnik: Well, i'll be off looking for more fanfics to treat you with... H Hog: We'll be happy not seeing you next time, Your immense density. (MST'rs laugh) Robotnik: I'll have the last laugh around here! Just wait!!! Snively, press the button! __________________ | | | PRESS YOUR | | OWN | | DAMN BUTTON!!! | |__________________| (Presses button, screen fades to black) H Hog: Well, that little experience sure did SUCK... Tonic: Now all we have to do is wait for the next fanfic... Sestren: Ohwell... I repeat: Sonic Spinball, anyone? All: Sure!!! (MST'rs leave) [Doors] 5. Patio door slides open, closes behind them. 4. Ice block melts instantly, turns into ice again. 3. Sliding bars retract, and extract again. 2. Forcefield lowers, and raises after MST'rs have entered. 1. Iris twirls open,and closes. (Toxic cave music is heard in the background) Cast of characters: H Hog: R. van Ophuizen Tonic: B.J. Brown Sestren: R. Cruz Armage(ddoner): (Haven't really asked his real name...) Auston: F. Kisaragi Mystery Sonic Theater 3000 originally created by Shorty, adapted by Tonic, Re-adapted by H Hog. (with permission, of course.) _____________________________________________ >Grounder: Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh | >SCRATCH: HHEHEHEHHEhehHEHHEHHEH!!!!! | | H Hog: Beavis and Butthead were here, | and they've taken over Scratch and Grounder. | _____________________________________________| Copyright 2000 H Hog productions (BEEP)